Join Kate, Sarah, Liz, and special guest Rebecca Lindenbach (co-author of The Great Sex Rescue and She Deserves Better) as we dive into the wildly contradictory messages about sex in evangelical spaces and why fantasy romance novels might just be providing women with the vocabulary they've been denied their whole lives.
And it might just be one of the most important episodes we ever make for you.
Turns out women having standards is revolutionary—who knew?
Topics Covered:
How research on 20,000 women revealed evangelical wives are having terrible, horrible, no good, very bad sex—and why the church's solution of "just do it more often" is spectacularly missing the point
How women are taught sex is the worst thing you can do...until it's the worst thing you could NOT do—and how this whiplash-inducing messaging creates both physical and emotional disconnection in marriage
Why romance novels like ACOTAR contain troubling consent dynamics we often overlook—and how this mirrors the ways women miss red flags in their own relationships (spoiler: Rhysand isn't always the consent king he's made out to be)
Why people freak out when women read romance—it's not that they expect their husbands to grow wings, it's that they might start expecting mutual pleasure and emotional connection (the audacity!)
How evangelical men's resources use pornographic language to "help" with temptation while simultaneously teaching women their bodies are dangerous weapons (make it make sense, please)
Practical advice for women who've been taught to dissociate during physical intimacy—and why it takes an average of 20 minutes for women to reach orgasm (not the 3 minutes evangelical sex books suggest)
Watch out! This episode might leave you questioning everything you've been taught about sex, wondering if your romance novels are actually therapeutic, and ready to burn Every Man's Battle in a cleansing fire. Consider this your permission slip to have standards! 💁♀️🔥✨
P.S. For women experiencing pain, obligation sex, or confusing dynamics in their marriages—you're not alone, and it's not your imagination. The data says there's something deeply wrong with how we've been taught, not with you.
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